Watching your thoughts might be the leading way to heal past hurts and create a positive attitude towards whatever you do. Pick one thing to watch for today: How many negative words do I direct towards myself; “Dummie, Idiot, Stupid Idiot, Moron, Loser, etc.” When you hear yourself delivering negative self-talk, STOP! Replace that thought with a positive one. Being the ultimate fan of Winnie the Pooh, I say, “Silly ol’ bear!”
Most of our self-talk is negative, and those negative thoughts hurt you. When I was lecturing across the country, I would pull a weight -lifter- looking guy out of the audience. “Put your arm out to the side. Don’t let me push it down to the ground.” I never could move his arm. “Now, think of something you wish you hadn’t done—you won’t tell us what it is—and nod your head when you have it. (pause) Nod. “In your mind trash yourself for whatever you chose. Repeat your judgment several times. Put that same arm to the side, Notice I’m using two fingers to do the same experiment I just did.” The arm drops down beside his leg. “Two minutes of self judgment and you weakened your whole body. What is happening to you if you judge yourself all the time?” Negative self talk harms you.
No one gets up in the morning saying, “Wonder what I can do to mess up my life today?” We are all trying to navigate the rough seas of life with whatever tools we have gathered. Even on your worst day, doing the best you can is good enough. God willing, you’ll have another day, one more lesson to be learned.
If a thought about yourself or anyone else is unkind or negative, catch yourself and change it. Don’t feel sad, don’t judge; there’s no need. Learning to always be kind, especially to yourself takes time. Be gentle with yourself!
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Scott A. McDaniel photo
